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As many of you know, I am a licensed wedding officiant and my business is called Nonconformist Nuptials. I write one-of-a-kind nondenominational ceremonies for those who dislike the typical cookie-cutter approach to weddings.
One of things I love to include in these ceremonies is the couples’ beloved pets. My dearly departed Westie, Ludwig, was the ring bearer in my wedding! To that end, I want to promote The Dog Perk (owned and operated by Tony and Amy Waara, colleagues of mine through the PetPAC business networking group) and their new line of wedding-focused dog bandanas.
Get a load of these terrific designs:
Just wanted to share this remarkable proposal. (I perform wedding ceremonies through Nonconformist Nuptials www.nonconformistnuptials.com.) What a fabulous community of friends and family they must have had to pull off this great feat!—Sid
Interview with multi-talented baby boomer, Sid Korpi
Sid Korpi, film and stage actress, social dance instructor, and pet chaplain, is far too talented and accomplished for this author to take credit for anything more than being an inspiration and catalyst for her recent weight loss, something she’d wanted to do for a long time. That’s good enough for me. Already athletic, fit, and beautiful, Sid became inspired after reading Thinking Skinny and decided to get healthier still. Losing those extra pounds gave her the edge she needed to pursue a film career with creative Minneapolis filmmaker, Christopher R. Mihm. I might also add that the same is true of the content in this article. Other than my questions, the words are Sid’s, and I would be remiss if I didn’t credit her as being co-author of this article. She is, in addition to the talents listed above, a gifted author and editor. I recently had a private interview with Sid, and this is how it went:
Nadia: Sid, Your life, long before we met has been a personification of the principles that I share in my upcoming book, Reinventing New Chapters in Your Life at any Age—and that I live by. I’d like to talk with you about each of the seven steps and hear your unique take on them. We’ll start with #1) Reshaping a healthier body and attitude. Sid, what was it about Thinking Skinny that resonated with you as you embarked on this new chapter in your life?
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Sid: When I learned that I was up for a major role in my first feature film, Chris Mihm’s marvelous B&W 1950s-drive-in-style creature feature B-movie, Attack of the Moon Zombies, (www.sainteuphoria.com) I knew what wound up 30-feet tall on the silver screen was going to be forever-after how I’d be seen. I also knew cameras notoriously add 20 pounds to one’s appearance, and given that, though fairly fit, I was already on the high end of “normal” as far as weight charts went, I really wanted to drop those 20 just to come out even.
I’d lived the diet yo-yo my entire life and vowed this was to be the end of that self-destructive cycle. I had your book, Thinking Skinny, on my shelf and was drawn to it. I read it in one sitting, let its contents sink in overnight, and awoke the next day ready to lose weight in a sensible, permanent way. I went to a website that calculated how many calories I needed to attain my goal weight, designed and printed out a chart on which I’d henceforth record all I’d eaten each day—because writing it all down made eating a conscious rather than reflexive act.
This wasn’t a “diet.” I know better than to ever tell myself that I “can’t” have something; I’m so rebellious, that would simply ensure I ruminated on said high-calorie item until I broke down and had too much of it. I planned to lose between one and two pounds per week, and I did just that by still eating whatever I wanted to, just in more reasonable portions. I also eat many small meals a day, which keeps my metabolism stoked continuously and wards off my “gorging” out of starvation. In several months’ time, I’d lost roughly 25 pounds and am approaching two years at this new weight. I knew I could see myself onscreen and not cringe, except for my scary-looking 1950s bangs, and those were on purpose. (You can see what I’m talking about in the official trailer at www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkMF0oGubho.)
People have been raving over the positive change in me, which is very nice, but more importantly, I can rave over that change—because it’s my opinion of me that matters most. The best part now is that “moving” (my new, less-punitive term for exercise) is its own reward. For instance, I consider myself fortunate when the lot is mostly full and I can park on the sixth level of a parking ramp and use the stairs instead of the elevator to get where I’m going. I can confidently say I have the energy of someone nearly half my age.
To initially attain and now maintain my weight loss, I also record how much (and what kind of) exercise I get each day. The same website I mentioned earlier gives approximations of calories burned doing several dozen different activities, even housework, so I can monitor that, too. I’ve bought a quality pedometer and wear it religiously every day and record my mileage walked each week. It’s keeping both my four West Highland white terriers and me healthy and committed to getting in two-to-three-mile walks almost every day. You know you’ve made a permanent life change when, instead of say, reluctantly dragging yourself to a gym because you “have to,” you feel absolutely gypped when you don’t “get to” walk/dance/do Pilates, etc. for at least a few minutes every day.
Nadia: I can wholly relate to feeling gypped when I don’t “get to” ride my bicycle or take a long walk. Now let’s move on to #2) Realigning relationships and spiritual self: To use your own words from a previous interview we had on this subject, you’ve suffered a tsunami of loss with regard to your family, friends and relationships. How did you manage to get through it and go on?
Sid: In a few years’ time, I lost my mother, stepfather, uncle, three cats, three dogs, a cockatiel, two of my best women friends and my 15-year marriage. Talk about wiping out everyone you loved and who you thought loved you! I’ll be honest with you; I cried my heart out every single day for more than two years. That’s not hyperbole, just a cold fact. There were times I wondered why I was left here when so many of my loved ones were on the Other Side. I even had thoughts of suicide during these darkest of days.
As a matter of fact, these thoughts became so pervasive at one point, I went to the hospital emergency room one Sunday, hoping I could be kept under observation overnight until I could get started on an antidepressant prescription the next day, when I’d already had an appointment with a psychiatrist. (Clinical depression runs in my family and several of my relatives have attempted/succeeded at committing suicide, so I believed I had just cause to worry about being alone at that time.) What happened, however, still boggles my mind.
I spoke to the ER doctor about all this and, instead of receiving any validation or compassion for what I was going through, he said, “This isn’t a hotel. Go home and call us if you actually have a ‘plan’ to kill yourself.” I was summarily asked to leave the hospital.
I had hit my proverbial “rock bottom.”
If ever there were someone who was made to feel absolutely worthless, absolutely unworthy of the most basic human compassion, it was I right then. Yet, standing in the doorway of that hospital, more completely alone than I’d ever been in my life, something profound happened that changed me forever. I still remember vividly this sensation I had deep in my chest, at my physical core, of a tiny little flame like that of a candle. I was overwhelmed by a certainty that that core light represented the part of me that belonged to, indeed was one and the same as, the greater Universe and was necessarily just as valuable and worthy of love as all that is eternal.
It came to me in rush that I’d just been presented with an astounding opportunity to learn an invaluable life lesson. I learned that, despite being stripped of every external source of support and compassion, I was still worthwhile. I was still worthy of love. I was still valuable even if the only person who could or would consistently show me this was myself. I stood there and wept with gratitude for the lesson I’d been brought, despite how painful it had been in its presentation. I even forgave that heartless doctor and silently thanked him for his callous rejection.
I know now never to turn outward to find validation of my worth. I know, too, never to doubt that I deserve love as much as any other living being. I know, moreover, I need to get that love and acceptance from myself first and foremost, and usually, similar support from others follows.
I joined Emotions Anonymous soon after this event, to rebuild my lost community with people who would understand my struggles and not judge. Through this 12-step program, I learned to give up control over my emotions and give them over to my Higher Power. I never again considered suicide. As I became strong, I was able to help others as I helped myself. I stuck with EA for more than two years and to this day remain close friends with several of the people I met through this literally life-saving program.
Nadia: Let’s talk about #3) Redirecting thought patterns toward the possibilities: I’d love to hear how you do this Sid. You’ve had such an eclectic career, and several interesting businesses. Obviously, you are in tune with “possibilities” in a way not found in many other people.
Sid: On a lark, I once visited a psychic at the Renaissance Festival who told me, almost apologetically, as she read my tarot cards that she saw that I would always be changing from one thing to the next, usually with little to no financial reward, and never settle on one thing as my career. I expect she thought I’d be chagrined about that “news,” but instead I said, “Oh, sure, I know that. That’s what I love most about myself!”
I am very driven by the need to personally challenge myself. I’ll often start some new creative endeavor—like designing jewelry, writing a novel, or singing with an early-jazz band—and always see it through to some kind of completion. However, once I win some award or recognition for it (a blue ribbon at the Bemidji Art Fair, a first-place-for-extended-fiction award and publication in the Close to the Ground: Powderhorn Writers Anthology, and a gig at the Minnesota State Fair, respectively) I feel I can move on to the next thing.
“Been there, done that, moving on now” is a kind of creative mantra for me.
I can only stick with things that inherently provide variety, such as my 15 years running my Proof Positive writing/editing business, which never has me composing or reading the same thing twice. Put me in a cubicle, expect me to follow corporate edicts, and make me punch a time clock and you may as well pronounce me brain-dead on arrival. I’ve structure my life so it will always be interesting for me.
Nadia: Then there is#4) Rediscovering the magic in your life: How do you stay young at heart and maintain the fun and excitement in your life?
Sid: I am childfree by choice and have instead opted to retain much that is childlike in me. The world can sometimes be a downright frightening place, and I feel I’m on a mission to remind adults around me of the importance of playing; of having fun, being creative, joyful, and downright silly; and not giving a fig what others think of them for doing so. I’ve been known to wear a mini dress and go-go boots out dancing to a ’60s band, a poodle skirt and saddle shoes when it’s a ’50s band, and so on. I’m my own walking/dancing retro vignette. People around me either gravitate toward the energy and sense of fun or they back away slowly, shaking their heads; either is just fine by me. I don’t need everyone to like or even understand me.
Case in point, I just turned 50 in January, and I threw myself a birthday wake. I rented a coffin, in which I lay as my friends and family “eulogized” me. I’d frequently pop up to laugh at their jokes or throw marshmallows at anyone who got too into “roasting” me. We held this in a church basement and had a reception of Jell-O salads and tater tot hot dish among the delicious items in the Church Basement Ladies potluck buffet. Afterward, we played board games. Frankly, it was awesome!
I did this because I firmly feel we’ve got it wrong when we hold back on telling our family of choice what we think of them and what influence they’ve had on us and the world in general until their respective funerals. That’s just a bit too late. Sure, I think my mother’s spirit enjoyed the 21-squirt-gun salute we gave her at her memorial service (which devolved into a water fight, just as she would have wanted), but it’s important to share these things with our loved ones while they’re here, too.
I try to be a role model for authentic eccentricity. Thanks to this event, I got to learn that I have a sort of fan club of four 20-something young ladies who all say they want to be me when they grow up. I quickly correct them and say, “There’s no ‘growing up’ involved if you really want to be like me.”
Nadia: #5) Removing lingering regrets: Each of us must find ways to do this. How have you managed?
Sid: Most of us are more likely to be kinder to strangers than we are to ourselves. To correct that inequity, start by admitting your mistakes without blaming others in any way for your actions, even if they’re deeply involved. You’re no one’s victim as long as you learn and grow from any experience. Forgive yourself for things you were too afraid to do, for opportunities you missed, and take baby steps toward finding and freeing your inner courage—and reward those steps. Forgive yourself for wishing and hoping you could change someone else to attain the love and acceptance you could/should have been giving yourself all along. Forgive yourself for accepting responsibility for things that really were beyond your control. The fact is you’ve screwed up in the past; you’ll no doubt screw up again in the future. Just try not to keep screwing up in the exact same ways over and over. That’s nuts. Instead expect to screw up once in awhile in unique ways in your attempts to try out new ways of being. It keeps things interesting and proves you’re still growing, evolving, and becoming your finest you.
Nadia: #6) Rewrite a new life chapter: Sid, when I first heard you tell the story of how you set your sights on appearing in a Christopher Mihm film, and how you went about that, it was obvious to me that you set a goal and focused through to completion. Would you tell it to the readers here?
Sid: I had read about this local filmmaker who was dedicated to making black-and-white, 1950s-style horror movies in honor of his dead father, with whom he’d always watched these kinds of films as a kid. His stepdaughter had also been diagnosed with cancer and while she fought to recover (she’s since passed her five-year cancer-free marker—yeah!), he thought to himself something like, “What the heck am I waiting for? I’ve always said I wanted to make one of these movies. The time to do it is now.” That attitude and those circumstances really resonated with me.
My husband and I attended the world premiere of Chris’s third movie, Cave Women on Mars. I’d never been so grateful that I wasn’t lactose intolerant in my life (it was so terrifically cheesy, you see). I determined then and there that before I died I had to have something to do with one of this guy’s movies.
So I decided to stalk him.
Actually, all that entailed was one email, but “stalking” sounds more melodramatic. In my email, I mentioned that I was willing to be an extra, a prop mistress, a dead body, whatever he needed. I downloaded a photo of my high school theater trophy that named me Outstanding Dramatic Performer of 1980, with the caption “Proof I’m talented.”
I’d also read that he liked to write his movie scripts with places in mind where he knew he could shoot rather than have to build sets or scout locations. So, I offered him the use of our third floor dance studio, which is decorated like a ’50s malt shop, and invited him to visit it sometime. A month or so passed before he finally responded, but he took me up on my offer to check out the room.
Worried we might be serial killers or something, Chris brought along his star of Cave Women on Mars, Dan Sjerven, as his bodyguard. They wound up hanging out with us for three hours. We all knew an important, meant-to-be connection had been made.
Two movies later, my husband and I were given walk-on roles in Destination: Outer Space with one line apiece—actually the exact same line. We each got to say, “Greetings, Wise One.”
I helped out as “script Nazi” after our scene was shot (i.e., reading the robot’s part and making sure leading man Josh Craig remembered all his lines). Perhaps it was then that Chris noticed I could actually speak more than three words of his purposely clunky dialogue in succession and tucked away that knowledge for future reference because he gave me a leading role in his next movie, Attack of the Moon Zombies.
Initially, his lovely wife, Stephanie, was supposed to play Administrator Ripley and I was to be Dr. Rutherford, a much smaller part. But as Chris wrote the screenplay, Ripley’s role got a lot bigger, and Stephanie, who had just had a baby and was working full-time, said she didn’t want to have to memorize that much dialogue. She told Chris, “Give the role to Sid.” That’s the nice version of how it happened. If you ask me, I think it was really because Ripley needed to have a bit of “bitch” in her and Chris knew I could definitely bring that to the table more than the truly sweet-at-heart Steph.
Anyway, long story short, the movie rocked the world, I was nominated for a Best Actress in a Zombie Movie Dead Letter award from MailOrderZombie.com, and I was subsequently cast as Leigh, the eccentric dog lady/haunted-home owner, in Mihm’s current film, House of Ghosts. This movie—an homage to director William Castle of The Tingler, House on Haunted Hill and 13 Ghosts fame—was actually filmed in our house though, ironically, not in the third-floor malt shop. That’s going to be featured in this summer’s giant-spider movie.
Nadia: And now #7) Reveal and live your intentions: Sid, please bring me up to date on your activities, there must be some new things in your life now, and on the horizon.
Sid: A few years back, I made a deal with myself that I wouldn’t audition for any plays anymore because of the time commitment and would only do them if they sort of fell into my lap—so I’d know they were meant to be. That philosophy got me the roles of Gertrude in Steve Martin’s comic play The Underpants, Mrs. Ellie Banks in Father of the Bride, and Jeri Neal in The Dixie Swim Club.
Since making these Mihm movies, I’ve been in two short independent films with burgeoning filmmakers Timothy Printup and Katie Cragoe, Treasure Box and Breaking for Home, each starring opposite the talented young actress Kira Pontiff. I’m thrilled to have been a part of their maiden voyages into moviemaking and really respect that they set a goal to do these two films in two months and made it happen. I always want to support and encourage those who actually follow through on their dreams.
My costar in House of Ghosts, Justen Overlander (Ray), a hilarious writer/actor/director himself, offered me the role of Goldie in his new movie, The Bequeather. It’s a comedy along the lines of Young Frankenstein set in the 1950s—my favorite era! We start filming in May, and I couldn’t be happier to be working with Justen and Mike Cook, another of my costars from Attack of the Moon Zombies and House of Ghosts (Dr. Edwards/Harlan, respectively) in this new movie.
And as I mentioned earlier, Chris Mihm is working on a giant spider movie, as part of a drive-in double feature. I know I’m to be in it in some capacity, but I don’t know exactly what my role will be yet. I’m game for anything. I’ve even offered to let his son’s tarantula climb on me.
We’re opening up our 1886 Victorian home to the Minneapolis/St. Paul Home Tour at the end of April, in time to promote the May 23, 2012, premiere of House of Ghosts at the Heights Theatre in Columbia Heights, Minn., the oldest continuously operating movie theater in the state. It has an awesome Wurlitzer pipe organ that comes out of the ground and is played before the movie. I’m busy promoting the heck out of this event and seeking the perfect vintage evening gown from a thrift store to wear on the red carpet that night. There’s a fashion war going on among the diehard Mihmiverse fans that are planning to dress up for the event, and I can’t be outdone. And yes, we take our premieres very pseudo-seriously. Who wouldn’t? There’s going to be free cake for heaven’s sake!
In between all of that stuff, I’m sure I’ll “work” now and then, too.
Nadia: I can appreciate your willingness to risk failure.You “get it,” and the potential rewards are unbelievable if you can let go of this fear. What advice do you have for others who seek to follow their passions as you have yours?
Sid: I’ve often joked that I’ve failed at more things in my lifetime than most people do in a dozen lifetimes. But the word in need of redefining there is “failed.” I’ve only failed at anything if its success is measured in dollar signs, brand-new sports cars and vacation homes in the Bahamas. For me, success is measured by how many of my various talents I’ve been able to explore in unique ways, regardless of the fiscal payoff, and how much my creativity has added to the value of my life and the lives of those around me.
For instance, the book I was spiritually guided to write after my tsunami of loss, Good Grief: Finding Peace After Pet Loss, has won four literary awards—including “Best Self-Help Book of the Year” from Premier Book Awards—and I continually hear from people about how much it has helped them navigate their grief after losing a beloved animal companion. Is it a New York Times Bestseller? Nope. But its topic has staying power; it continues to sell at a fairly steady pace and is even coming due for a second edition printing. I risked a lot of my own money to get it published and have earned back every penny and am now actually a little in the black. Writing it has led to my getting public speaking gigs, too, which represents another modest revenue stream.
Anyone can follow my circuitous path to creative fulfillment. The first thing you have to do is decide that personally providing your household with financial security is a low priority for you. (Inheriting a huge trust fund or marrying a zillionaire can help here.) That doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t be responsible, respect money, and even aspire to be rich beyond all imagining—heck, it may even be in your cards to wind up this way, so you should be ready for that possibility, too. You just have to be OK with the uncertainty that risk-taking brings with it and value what the process itself will bring you more than you do a steady paycheck.
To ensure domestic harmony, make sure your life partner is on board with this plan, of course. My darling hubby has a quasi-reliable income (after a 20% pay cut across the board two years ago at the company where he works, that is) to ensure we’ll at least cover the mortgage payment. Though not getting me off the hook for pulling my own financial weight, this frees me up to do a bit more of my soul-feeding stuff without too much guilt that I’ll render us homeless.
Lest you think I lie around eating bonbons all day, however, I’ll have you know I also operate several other home-based businesses: Proof Positive Editing, my bread-and-butter proofreading/freelance writing/wordsmithing business for the past 15 years; Nonconformist Nuptials, wherein I write and officiate wedding ceremonies for those who balk at the traditional, cookie-cutter approach; and Two Right Feet Dance, through which my husband and I teach beginning social dances like swing, rumba, waltz, etc. Our motto is “Forget Fred and Ginger—we’ll have you dancing like Fred and Wilma in no time!” (This makes particular sense because we have a Flintstones shrine in our basement that has been on TV and in the newspaper.) Each of these brings in a little bit of money, costs me almost nothing to operate, and lets us write off sections of our home as tax deductions.
I’ve even finally found a way to make a little bit of money from my acting. (Alas, there’s been no money so far in the much-beloved B-movie or community theater worlds in which I dabble, but I do these for my soul anyway.) I am paid to act through the Standardized Patient Program at the University of Minnesota. I’ve gotten to portray various patients for med students, dental students, psychiatric nursing students, veterinary students and even law students to practice their communication and practical skills. Over the past couple of weeks alone, I’ve gotten to portray a woman who is “itchy,” receive 12 head-to-toe physicals (it’s been confirmed that I’m quite healthy, thank you), AND settle a fictitious lawsuit through mediation for $5 million! I get to exercise my improvisation muscle and get paid a bit for it. Happy times!
I’ve weathered this great recession better than most because, frankly, I’m used to being broke and subsequently had less to lose both financially and emotionally in the economic downturn. I believe I can adapt to change a bit more easily than most because I’ve always had to diversify or die. But above and beyond just being a means of survival, to me, each of these endeavors represents a different colorful thread in the gorgeous tapestry of my life. I don’t do beige. Instead, I say, “Bring on the rainbow hues!”
Sid Korpi is the human caregiver to seven rescued pets, a compulsively creative person, and is known to act in B-movies for food. She is grateful to be married to an understanding man who thinks life with her and all the critters is an adventure. Her websites are www.goodgriefpetloss.comand www.tworightfeetdance.comand www.nonconformistnuptials.com.
Continue reading on Examiner.com Interview with multi-talented baby boomer, Sid Korpi – National baby boomer | Examiner.com http://www.examiner.com/baby-boomer-in-national/interview-with-multi-talented-baby-boomer-sid-korpi#ixzz1pZHms3o8
As many of you know, I am an ordained nonsectarian minister/wedding officiant and run a business called Nonconformist Nuptials. Yesterday (May 14), I had the privilege of performing the wedding ceremony for Kimberly Nickel and Ted Johnson at the Black Bear Crossing Lakeside Pavilion at Como Park in St. Paul, Minnesota.
Kim’s sister/matron of honor, Jenny, had recommended me to her after having met me through her work with the Carver-Scott Humane Society, at whose fundraiser, the Walk Fur Love, I’ll be selling my books (“Good Grief: Finding Peace After Pet Loss“) on May 22.
Como Lake as viewed from the Pavilion
The setting was beautiful; the bride, groom and their respective entourages, glorious; and Mother Nature…dare I say it?…well, she was kind of a bitch. This “spring” (in quotation marks because we really haven’t had one following one of the longest, toughest, snowiest winters in Minnesota history) has given us about three days of spring; a couple of hottest, most-humid summer-like days; and a ton of residual winter.
Yesterday, it gave us gray skies, arctic winds, rain, and 44˚ temps. Of course, we couldn’t spoil the look of the gorgeous dresses and suits worn by the bridal party by covering them up with parkas, so the girls, wearing strapless gowns made of cold-conducting satiny fabric, and I got to literally freeze our smiles in place. I’m certain our various goosebumps could be detected by low-flying planes.
But what was most remarkable was everyone’s complete lack of tyrannical behavior or rampant complaining!
In addition to the frigid climes, we discovered the marriage license had been forgotten in the hotel room and one of the attendants had to race back to get it. Then we had to ditch the idea of lighting the Unity Candle during the ceremony because nothing could stay lit even momentarily, I just explained what the act would have symbolized and told the crowd the couple would simply do this at the reception instead. Kim remained calm, composed, and smiling no matter what happened.
She was Zen-like (or maybe she’ll already frozen solid in her happy place, I’m not sure). Either way, I was extremely impressed. She and Ted had had to scramble to find another officiant just two weeks before the wedding because of “artistic differences” with their formerly scheduled person. Then, in that short time, always known for being a time of brides losing their minds from managing details, she (and possibly Ted) managed to shop for some really awesome Flintstones memorabilia (some Flintstones Fortune Tellers and four Hardee’s commemorative Flintstones glasses) as gifts for me because she’d visited my home and seen my Flintstones shrine in the basement! I was floored not only by the generosity and thoughtfulness, but by her rising above the conditions that would have overwhelmed most other women in her position to be generous and thoughtful!
Did we all wish the weather had been more cooperative on the wedding day? Of course. But did we all perform like pros and pull off a lovely, meaningful, and memorable ceremony in spite of Nature’s best efforts to mess things up? Absolutely! Yeah, team Nickel-Johnson!!
My heartfelt thanks to Kim, Ted and all their friends and family for making this wedding one I will remember forever—more for how warm they made me feel inside than for how cold I was on the outside! Congratulations, newlyweds!!!—Sid
P.S. Sometime soon, I will have photos and maybe even a video of their ceremony to post on my Nonconformist Nuptials Photo Gallery page. Check in to see it.
Please listen in tomorrow, Monday, Oct. 18, 2010, at 4 p.m. Central time for host Nadia Giordana’s terrific blog talk radio show, “Interviews with Extraordinary Women.” In this interview, I’ll be attempting to explain my clearly eccentric approach to life, work and happiness. Call in with questions and join the fun, or give a listen to the show at a later time in its archived version. (I’ll post this soon on this blog’s Radio Interviews page.)
Nadia’s description of the show follows:
Nadia Giordana
Actress Sid Korpi on “Attack of the Moon Zombies” and Other Stuff
My guest today is the multitalented, Sid Korpi. We’ll be talking about all the interesting things she’s done in her life. Among them: English teacher, Journalist/freelance writer, Prize-winning novelist, co-author of a book on Reflexology, Jewelry designer, Actor/member of a comedy troupe, Game inventor, Aerobics/fitness instructor, Singer with an early jazz band/band, Halloween party mogul—Morticia Stewart’s Party Kits, Murder mystery dinner theater playwright/actor/host and more. We’ll find out which of those hats shes wearing most often these days, and where you can see her public performances.
The following is an article about my and my business Nonconformist Nuptials posted on the Adventurous Writer website by Laurie Pawlik Kienlen
Wedding Officiant Career Profile – What Ordained Ministers Do
September 25th, 2010 • Related • Filed Under
Here’s one of the best parts of working as a wedding officiant:
“I never encounter Bridezillas!” says Minnesota-based ordained minister Sid Korpi. “By definition, nonconformists shun the over-the-top trappings of a conventional wedding. These couples seek wedding ceremonies that are customized to them, that reflect their history together, and that reveal their personalities and values.”
Ordained ministers may perform weddings in churches, or while jumping out of airplanes — so they need to be prepared for anything!
And here is Korpi’s job profile, plus her career tips for aspiring ministers…
Career Profile – Wedding Officiant
Korpi is a wedding officiant/nonsectarian minister through Universal Ministries; her business is called Nonconformist Nuptials. She is legally ordained and registered with the state of Minnesota to perform marriage ceremonies.
How Much Money Does an Ordained Minister Make?
“I work as a minister on a part-time basis,” says Korpi. “I average about eight to 10 weddings per year and charging roughly $150–$200 apiece.”
She and her husband also teach private social dance lessons through their home-based business, Two Right Feet Dance. They specialize in getting couples ready for their first wedding dance and/or teach dance at the wedding reception. Those lessons are either $50 each or $135 for a prepaid package of three 90-minute lessons.
In a separate but somewhat similar job, Korpi also works as an animal chaplain.
The Best Parts of Working as a Wedding Officiant … to learn more click here
This past weekend, I performed a wedding ceremony alongside the shore of Lake Superior in Two Harbors, Minnesota. The setting alone was magical, but several things set apart this event as singularly meaningful for me. The first was that my hubby and I took a six-mile walk along the harbor that morning and at the end of the journey encountered a doe and her white-spotted fawn. I knew that was a wonderful omen for the ceremony that would take place later in the day. Then, an otherwise cool-ish, cloudy/foggy day miraculously cleared to temperate sunshine just half an hour before the ceremony. Finally, one of my most poignant experiences of the afterlife and our connection to those on the Other Side, as recounted in my book in the story Mavis’ Ladybug (pg. 76 excerpted below), came back to revisit me.
Mavis’ Ladybug
I was blessed to know a phenomenal woman named Mavis Vitums
for more than a decade. There were more times than I could count
when I saw evidence of her doing the work of angels in people’s lives,
my own included. She was the most giving person I think I’ve ever
known. In her sixty-eight years on Earth, she had fostered dozens
upon dozens of children and later gave homes to adults in need of
foster care, including my stepfather Leonard and his mentally
retarded brother Benjamin, who both lived quite happily in Mavis’
home until their deaths in 2001 and 2003, respectively.
After years of battling numerous forms of cancer and heart disease
— after even having died twice in the ER and been resuscitated — she
finally chose to let herself stop fighting and truly transform into the
celestial being I knew she always was on the inside.
However, while she was in hospice care in her nursing home
room, a few days before she died, I had said to her, “Mavis, we have
to work out an important detail. What are you going to send me as a
sign that you’re around and doing all right once you pass? I want to
be able to recognize it.”
She thought a moment and then said with a grin, “A ladybug.
Red with black spots. I think they’re classy.”
Well, she died on September 19, 2007, and I was to perform a
wedding ceremony on September 21. I’d gone into the ladies’ restroom
at the golf course clubhouse in Shakopee, Minnesota, for a
final freshening up before the ceremony was to begin, and when I
reached into a basket of paper towels to dry my hands, I stopped
short because there, atop the stack of towels was a red ladybug with
black spots!
The members of the bridal party who’d been gathered there waiting
for the big moment said they’d seen it earlier and just thought,
“Oh that’s nice. It’s good luck.”
I told them of Mavis’ promise to send me a ladybug, and they
promptly cursed me out for making them all cry before the ceremony.
I put the bug on my left palm and ran around the party room, showing
as many of the 250 guests and/or wedding party members as I
could find. The ladybug just contentedly sat on my hand, occasionally
stretching its legs and preening but otherwise never budging. I
picked up my note cards and decided I would perform the ceremony
with a bug on my hand. The wedding went off without a hitch; I can’t
imagine where my newfound confidence could have come from!
My husband took a Polaroid picture of this as untampered-with
photographic evidence.
After about an hour of holding my palm turned upward, though, my
hand started to cramp. I said to the ladybug, “I’m going to have to have
you climb up on my dress, okay?”
As if it understood me, it began crawling toward my chest when I held
my hand next to me and wound up positioning itself on my dress approximatelywhere a brooch would go. It sat there for nearly another half-hour then got a little bit “antsy,” pardon the pun, and crawled along my collar.
I said to it, “Oh, I get it. You have to go now, right? I’ll take you
outside.”
I placed the bug back on my left palm, where it sat, pouting, legs
tucked in and unmoving. My husband, Anthony, and I went outside
to near the waterfall beside which I’d just performed the ceremony.
The ladybug remained motionless until I said, “I see some impatiens
in the rocks over there. I’ll put you there, okay?”
The instant I’d said that, the bug began crawling up my palm to
the tip of my index finger, just like a trained flea circus performer. I
placed my finger next to a leaf on the purple impatiens plant, and the
ladybug readily climbed onto it. I turned for just a second to hug my
husband and say tearfully to the heavens, “Mavis, you rock!”
When I turned back, the ladybug had disappeared.
Later on, as we were leaving, I saw Stacy, a.k.a. the new Mrs. Jake
Adelmann, racing across the parking lot like a runaway bride, only
she was running toward us. She called out, “Tell your friend how
grateful we are she came to our wedding!”
Back to the present-day wedding. After we spotted the two deer that day, I had said aloud to my husband, Anthony, “Now all we need is a ladybug to make this wedding perfect!”
After the ceremony, Anthony and I were assigned seats at the table with the groom’s parents, grandparents and other family friends for the reception dinner. Later on in the evening, I was chatting with one of the family friends about my book, because she and her husband are animal lovers and she’d shared that her own neighbor had just lost her young chihuahua who’d been hit by a car, and for some reason I’d just started sharing the “Mavis’ Ladybug” story when my eye was suddenly drawn to the table’s centerpiece (made, I later found out, by the bride’s mother). Earlier on, I’d seen two ceramic mushrooms standing in a bed of succulent-like ground cover, thought it was a lovely arrangement but investigated it no further. When I took a closer look, however, chills broke out on my arms and I squealed in delight.
Set in the center of the table’s decoration was a vintage-looking box with the word and a picture of a LADYBUG. In its open slot was a ceramic ladybug itself! This was the only design of its kind in the whole room, and I was seated next to it! I took a photo of the arrangement as evidence, yet again, that Mavis was watching over me. (Double click on the photo to see it enlarged for detail.)
If all this weren’t twitterpating enough, I learned the reason the bride’s mother had chosen this particular item was because when her daughter was a teenager, her nickname was “Ladybug”!! (When she saw me totally spazzing over it, the bride’s mother kindly agreed to go to the store where she’d found this one and send me one of the ladybugs as a memento. Anthony gave her the money to cover the purchase.)
Then, she topped all this off by my telling me that she and her husband had seven adopted children and, over the years, 19 fostered kids—giving homes and love to those who need it most—just like Mavis had!!! Don’t hand me “coincidence” here. This is what miracles are made of in my world!
Mavis, you continue to rock, nearly three years after your passing from this physical plane!! The afterlife connections continue, and I am forever grateful!
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